


It's Not Always About The Money

by fireflysglow_archivist



Category: Firefly
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-05-14
Updated: 2003-05-14
Packaged: 2019-04-29 08:40:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14469003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireflysglow_archivist/pseuds/fireflysglow_archivist
Summary: Jayne's thoughts on being on the ship





	It's Not Always About The Money

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Firefly’s Glow](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Firefly%27s_Glow), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Firefly's Glow collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/fireflysglow/profile).

 

It's Not Always About The Money

## It's Not Always About The Money

### by ladybug

It?s not always about the money 

By: Ladybug  
E-mail: Dragon00@chilitech.net 

For as long as he could clearly remember he?d been on his own. At the ripe old age of twelve, his mother and father had more or less abandoned him. He never knew the reason why for sure and as time wore on he found he didn?t really care. It hadn?t mattered. It had taken until he was twenty to reach is full height and muscular physique, but even as a teenager Jayne Cobb was big enough to take care of himself. 

Not having fancy manners or ever really finishing school didn?t much matter when all he ever had to do was fight and fight well to earn his keep. There was always work for a mercenary. Someone was always looking for muscle. Jayne honestly couldn?t remember a time when he went around unarmed, or unprepared for trouble. Couldn?t remember a time when he didn?t have to watch out for himself. 

In his line of work ?cutthroat? was not just an adjective, it was a way of life. So Jayne learned fast not to trust, to never depend on anyone else but himself. Loyalty was a liability, not an asset. 

And with no one else to watch his back it meant it was always about the money. Always. Money was what kept the wolf from the door. It got you a supply of ammo, food to eat, a stiff drink, a place to sleep and maybe someone to share your bed for a night or two. 

He?d lived like that so long he?d forgotten that on Serenity, serving with Malcolm Reynolds, it didn?t have to be solely about money. Just for a moment he lost sight of the fact that on Mal?s boat he had people who?d watch his back, who actually gave a damn about the people they ate with. The money the alliance offered for Simon Tam and his sister, River, was just too tempting. Especially when a lifetime of habit and experience said it was too good to pass up. 

It wasn?t until the alliance turn on him that Jayne realized they were possibly less trustworthy than his previous associates. He should have known better. Should have never expected them to honor a deal. 

When Mal left him the air lock, blue eyes the color of glacier ice chilling him to the bone with the fury they held, he realized what it was his stupidity had nearly cost him. It had taken longer than it should have but Jayne finally began to understand that Mal wasn?t like the others he?d worked for. Oh the captain could be just as vicious, ruthless and all around hard ass, but he protected his own. Treated the well being of his crew seriously, taking responsibility for them. 

As he sat in the air lock grateful that Mal hadn?t spaced him, Jayne realized he wanted to stay on Serenity. That despite his bitching and moaning, he liked it here. He liked having his own room, full access to a clean galley, and a share in the profits. Admittedly the profits weren?t as high as they could be if Mal were like the others Jayne had worked for. But then, the others would have spaced him without a second thought. 

He?d been given a second chance, and Jayne was determined not to waste it. He knew all too well he wouldn?t get another one. Mal gave him an ultimatum, and the captain was the sort to follow through on threats. He had to be or he?d have never survived in this business as long as he had. 

Determined to make the most of his second chance, to prove to Mal he hadn?t made a mistake in letting him live, that he could be trusted, Jayne set about changing his ways. Buying apples for the crew was part of that effort. He knew they all appreciated the fresh fruit even if they kept giving him the eye, expecting some hidden motive. He?d hidden his amusement thinking that he did have an ulterior motive, just not the one they all were looking for. 

He?d gone along to rescue Mal from Niska, surprising the others as well as himself. Jayne had never really given a damn about anyone but himself before. Now he worried that if Mal didn?t come back he?d not be allowed to stay. He knew the others didn?t like him much, and Zoe likely wouldn?t hesitate to toss his ass off Serenity. The dark-skinned woman had never made any bones about what she thought of him. 

He knew that wasn?t the only reason he went after Mal. Not even by half. He was beginning to understand how Zoe could be so loyal to the man, following him through hell and back. Jayne wondered if she?d appreciate the irony of the two of them having that in common. 

Jayne shook his heads trying to rid himself of those thoughts. He was not one to dwell on the past. He took a deep breath and set about cleaning his weapons. It was something he did regularly, but not always out of need to keep his weapons in working order. The routine helped to settle his thoughts and let him focus. Shepherd Book referred to it as a form of meditation, something Jayne scoffed at. 

He stripped Vera, his biggest and best gun, laid the parts out in order, to be cleaned and checked for wear. The last few weeks had been good, and Vera hadn?t been needed. They had a couple of small, profitable jobs. Legitimate even. 

Jayne laughed softly. Having legitimate jobs made Inara happy. The companion had could set up appointments with her well to do clients and keep them on time. 

Jayne rolled his eyes thinking about her. It wasn?t like they did things to mess up her little plans on purpose. He thought about spitting, and then thought better of it. She might be better dressed, with fancy manners, but to his way of thinking she was no better than the whores he knew. Not really. She sold herself the same as they did, just had herself a better class of customers and made a damn sight more for it. 

Given what he thought of her, he?d made a point of avoiding her lately. Figured if Mal was willing to fight a duel for her honor, he?d do well not to say or do something stupid to piss him off when it came to her. Somehow he could never quite say the right thing around her so avoidance seemed the best choice. Jayne knew full well Mal didn?t think any more of what she did for a living than he did. But he was beginning to understand that Mal thought well of HER, and that made all the difference. 

Jayne?s hands stilled for a minute thinking over what exactly that meant. Mal was the sort who really saw people, not just what they did for a living or their title and class. Would definitely explain why he hired on Wash even though Zoe, whose opinion Mal obviously valued, hadn?t cared for him in the beginning. And why he?d got Kaylee as a mechanic when anyone else would have overlooked her as being too young or too female to do the job. 

Jayne pursed his lips wondering what it was Mal saw in him. He frowned, hands again moving without conscious direction as he cleaned and reassembled Vera. He never really saw himself as having any sort of specialized skill. Not the way Kaylee or Wash did. All he thought he had to offer was manpower and damn good aim. Mal could get that from anyone else so it didn?t explain why he?d been given a second chance. 

Jayne shook his head. This was not the sort of puzzle he was good at. It was better to just roll with the punches. If there was something Mal wanted him to know, Jayne had no doubt the captain would tell him. 

He finished his self-appointed task and secured his guns. Since River had gotten hold of one and Mal bawled him out over it, Jayne was very careful with his weapons. The girl seemed a bit more stable now than she was then, but the mercenary wasn?t taking any chances. He didn?t want to give Mal any reason at all to change his mind. 

If he were more inclined to introspection he?d wonder why it was Mal?s opinion was becoming increasingly more important. It had been since before the hospital heist. It had been the disappointment, hurt and betrayal he saw in Mal?s eyes that had a greater impact on Jayne than the icy rage. 

Rage he could handle. It was an emotion he was used to. But the others made his gut hurt in an unfamiliar way. He didn?t like it. 

Mal hadn?t said anything to the others about his failed attempt at betrayal, something Jayne was grateful for. He should have expected that. Mal kept his word. 

The captain hadn?t treated him much differently. Maybe watched him a bit closer, but Jayne figured he deserved that. He?d never been considered completely trustworthy before, no reason to think Mal would think him trustworthy now. 

Except that Jayne wanted him to. Wanted for Mal to regard him with the same degree of quiet confidence and faith that he did Zoe. Jayne?s lips twisted in a bitter smile. Now he had something in common with Wash. Damn but his life had taken some weird turns lately. 

Jayne sighed, patting Vera fondly before leaving his bunk. He headed for the galley. Mal said something about a new job. Something else legit on a planet Jayne had never heard of. 

Legit was good though. Less likely someone would get hurt. Seemed like for awhile there someone was always getting injured. Kaylee got shot, Book had been shot, he?d gotten shot. Hell, even Simon had gotten shot when that damn bounty hunter had gotten on board. Zoe had gotten herself banged up but good that one time, and Mal?.Jayne hesitated, his chest suddenly too tight for him to breath easily. Mal had damn near died more than once. 

He took a shuddering breath, rubbing his chest trying to ease that ache. He tried not to think about Mal dying. Jayne didn?t know why it bothered him so much but it did. As he did with so many things he couldn?t quite fathom, Jayne shoved those feelings in the back of his mind and focused on the immediate. 

Focus on the job. Whatever the hell it was. Ignore the rest. Jayne nodded and took a deep breath. He?d do his job, which was rapidly becoming to do whatever Mal told him to, and then he wouldn?t have to worry about the rest. 

He slipped into the galley. Only Mal was there, sitting in his seat at the head of the table. The rest of them might sit in different places but Mal?s seat was always the head of the table. It was a constant that Jayne came to expect. His throat tightened without warning when he remembered the meals Mal hadn?t been in his usual place. And how close he?d come to losing his own place at the table. 

Jayne shook it off as he poured himself a cup of coffee, before he sat down. He picked the chair next to Mal. He sipped his coffee waiting for the captain to speak. With Mal, it was hard to know if he?d say anything or not. The man could be phenomenally tight lipped. 

?Jayne.? One word, greeting and welcome in one. The captain had a way of saying a lot without saying much at all. It was a skill Jayne admired. 

?Cap?n.? Jayne tipped his head, pleased to be acknowledged. Wasn?t that long ago Mal wouldn?t have spoken to him at all. This was progress. 

He sipped his coffee again. ?We got us a job?? 

Mal nodded, and his lips quirked slightly in a smile Jayne rarely saw. 

?Legit?? 

?Yep.? 

Jayne checked his first instinct to demand more information. Mal would only tell him to wait for the others anyway. And he wasn?t going to be the one to ruin the mood between them. Besides holding his tongue had made Mal?s smile grow and that made it more than worth it. 

The others filed in. Zoe and Wash together. They naturally took seats next to one another. Simon, River, and Kaylee filed in as group. Jayne wouldn?t have been the least surprised if they?d come in holding hands and skipping. River might be more stable but she still had her moments. Moments Jayne wasn?t sure were do to youthful high spirits or being crazy. He wasn?t going to ask either. 

Inara and Book were the last to enter. The companion had one hand curled in the crook of Book?s arm the way Jayne had seen her do with her clients. He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Couldn?t see any need for ?escorting? her around on Serenity. Damn boat wasn?t that big, and shit, the woman was able bodied, so it weren?t like she needed assistance to get around. Jayne thought civilized folk spent a lot of time doing stuff that wasn?t really necessary. He figured it had to do with not having much else to do but dream up rules for how they were supposed to behave. 

?We have a job, sir?? Zoe asked when everyone was seated. Her dark brown eyes focused on Mal. Jayne would never tell her but he respected Zoe. She was a strong, capable woman who handled herself and her weapons well. 

?That we do.? Mal glanced around, making eye contact with everyone. ?Little planet called Isolade. Seems they grow some sort of melon the core worlds are all fired up ?bout.? Mal shrugged one shoulder. It was a gesture that Jayne had come to recognize as Mal?s way of dismissing information he saw as irrelevant but still found necessary to pass on. 

?Only problem it the best time ta pick the things is in the middle of the rainy season. An? by rainy, I mean rainy. Like something out of the Shepherd?s Good Book. Roads are pretty much impassable from the time it starts until a month or so after it?s done.? 

Mal sat back slightly, one hand still curled around his coffee mug. ?Wouldn?t be a problem if the best fields for growin? these things weren?t as far from the port as they can get. Ain?t really got a landin? spot near the harvest area. Even for a ship the size of Serenity. Means only thing that can really land there is a shuttle.? 

?So we are using the shuttle to transport melons from the fields to the port?? Wash raised both eyebrows. ?A milk run?? 

?That be the size of it.? Mal looked at the pilot. ?Gonna be a problem?? The question was a simple inquiry, not confrontational. 

Wash shook his head. ?Nah. Shuttle is in good shape.? He grinned. ?Be nice to get some time in atmosphere again.? 

?Good.? Mal nodded. ?Jus? so you know, won?t be just us. Seems they got a tight time frame on the peak for these things. Got four or five others lined up to do the same thing we?ll be doing. All of them are small ships. Some of them here doin? repeat business, some first timers. Never had any trouble before with this set up before, an? they ain?t gonna get any from our end.? 

Hard blue eyes moved around the table making sure they all understood. They all knew the captain liked things to go smooth. A chorus of ?yes, sirs?, and nodding heads moved around the table answering him. 

?We?ll be runnin? night and day. Since there aren?t that many of us who can act as pilot, we?ll have to rotate duty. Wash and Zoe. Jayne, you?ll be with me. Eight hour shifts.? 

Jayne felt a small burst of warmth in his chest when Mal said that. It was silly, but he was still pleased that Mal picked him to partner with. Might not last, but he sure hoped it would. 

?Kaylee, we?ll be grounded for a week.? Mal sipped his coffee. ?Think that would be time ?nough for you to do the overhaul you were askin? ?bout the other day?? 

?More?n ?nough, Cap?n.? Kaylee beamed at him. No other word for it. Jayne as yet to figure out how the girl can be so gorram cheerful most of the time. It just isn?t natural in his opinion. 

?Good. Then you focus on that. Might even be able ta pick us up some new spare parts.? Kaylee looked like Mal just promised her to buy her the whole planet. ?You just be sure to get that engine runnin? smooth by the time we?re ready to leave, Kaylee girl.? 

?Sure thing, Cap?n.? 

Mal?s attention moved to Inara. The shapely brunette met his look easily. ?Don?t know what sort o? clients Isolade might have for you. Not sure they got anyone there that?d be up to your standards. But since we?ll be there for a bit?? Mal?s voice trailed off. 

The companion?s expression shifted slightly from her usual calm demeanor to one of thoughtful consideration. She smiled slightly. ?That?s quite all right, Mal. A week will be more than ample time for me to complete any business arrangements I may engage in. I?ll be fine.? 

Mal shrugged one shoulder again, then looked at Book. ?Preacher?Don?t rightly know what they might have for you.? 

?I?m sure I?ll be able to find something to occupy my time, Captain.? 

?Long as it don?t cause trouble.? The captain admonished before his attention focused on their two fugitives. ?Doc, would prefer you and your sister stay close to the ship.? Mal?s tone made it clear that he?s issuing an order, not a request. ?Planet ain?t part of the alliance, but they do a lot of business with ?em. ?Sides, I don?t want to be rescuing you from any bonfires.? A teasing glint lit up Mal?s eyes even though his expression remained serious. ?Course with all the rain they?ll be getting I imagine it?d be a might difficult to get one of those to really do more than warm yer toes.? 

Simon dropped his eyes looking just a bit embarrassed, but River smiled at him. Jayne is surprised to see how beautiful a girl she is now that he?s not so worried she?ll try to gut him again. ?We?ll be good, Daddy.? 

Mal snorted at being addressed that way, but didn?t comment otherwise. ?Okay people, unless you?ve got anything you need to add, that?s it.? 

Not surprisingly no one did. Jayne finished his coffee as the others filed out. Zoe and Wash were headed for the cockpit holding hands as they went. Inara for her shuttle, probably to check on likely clients. Kaylee and River were off to play a game of some kind. Simon and Book were discussing some cultural thing as they left. Jayne couldn?t help but find it funny how such disparate people managed to mesh so well. 

He hid his smile behind his cup. The merc didn?t want anyone to know how much he enjoyed being a part of their group, even if only on the fringes. Would ruin his image as a bad ass if they knew. Mal raised an eyebrow at him, but Jayne just shook his head. Somehow he was sure Mal understood. 

The captain saluted him with his mug, confirming that belief. Jayne felt a chuckle burble to the surface but managed to contain it. He wasn?t sure he?d be able to explain his good humor, and really didn?t want to have to try. He settled for a grin, and blinked in surprised when Mal responded in kind. A shared moment of camaraderie, one Jayne never really expected. 

It wasn?t often the captain made a display of genuine humor. Like he had with River earlier, Jayne was suddenly aware of how good looking a man Malcolm Reynolds was. That fleeting grin had transformed him for just a moment making him seem younger, more approachable, less hard. 

Before Jayne could really figure out what it meant Mal stood up. He patted Jayne?s shoulder as he left the galley. Ordinarily, the big merc would not have allowed the contact, but from Mal he didn?t mind. Jayne didn?t question his reaction, opting to just enjoy the moment where everything was right with his world. 

Finished with his cup, Jayne rinsed it and headed to the cargo bay to work out. He had the urge to recheck his weapons again, and fought against it. He knew he was prepared. Just had to find something else to do until it was show time. 

#### If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to ladybug


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